He Said, She Said; Finding Balance in a World of Words

This blog isn’t political though I have deeply strong thoughts about my government, the direction I’d like to see the country move, and the lack of integrity everywhere. Instead of talking about Kavanuagh or Ford and others in today’s hearing, I want to discuss language. The use of language in medical scenarios, such as melanoma cancer as described my Mayo Clinic.

Cold Calling

Health information is critical to making sense of a frightening diagnosis, mine was a second cancer diagnosis in 2017. The first time the biopsy came back positive for melanoma, my dermatologist left a terrifying message on my phone, the second time the same. I appreciated knowing up front that I have metastatic melanoma, and each time returned his call for more details.

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It’s what I describe as a cold call, learning that something is seriously wrong but needing to call to find out the details. Somehow, it would be more fitting to do this in person, but keep in mind time is of the essence when fighting cancer. After each of these calls, life went in to hyper-mode to learn what was next. The power of words, right?

Words can be critical to how we feel, our perspective on healing, and where we find our hope and courage. I want to hear what words have brought challenge to your life, what words have brought joy? Something as simple as clean scans are ginormous in a cancer patient’s life.

Them’s Fightin’ Words

Medically speaking, I’ve had some curiously frustrating situations. For example, in talking to my first local oncologist when I felt my cancer was back, she told me not to overreact. My local dermatologist made an illustration of how my excision was done and described the healing process. Unfortunately, I believed what they said, there words the gospel of medical belief.

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Except I pushed for a biopsy, except something felt wrong, except I needed to believe in myself because metastatic melanoma was in another area of my face. No blame as these medical professionals felt they were right, but jeez the time lost while I am feeling the he said she said of medical mistakes. Meanwhile, time had gone by….

My Hearing – No, I’m Not Up for SCOTUS!

Working with Dana Farber has been an incredible experience, the level of knowledge, the cancer research done there, and the integrity of the staff is amazing. Though my local radiation doctor didn’t feel I would have hearing loss, one of my Dana Farber oncologists, said it was very probable. Another he said, she said…I am going with what I know: my hearing is poor, I no longer have ear wax (just what you needed to know, right?),  and my left ear just feels different.

Sorry to complain, it’s not my point here at all. This writing is really a reminder to the collective we. We know our bodies, our minds, our spirits. Believe in yourself and find your inspiration. Balance is critical to our healing from disease; accurate information is essential and professional staff builds confidence.

Doctor, Doctor Give Me the News (Robert Palmer)

In August, I had a CT scan at Dana Farber that found a questionable area, and the minute I went in to see the best skin cancer oncologist ever (okay, I may be prejudiced!), he greeted my and immediately disclosed his concerns. He also let me know it was not melanoma, and that this was not his area of knowledge.

It turned out to be nothing of concern, but how reassuring to have my oncologist explain what they saw, what needed to happen, and admit that he was not the doctor for this concern. That’s integrity of words, using language to tell what is known, and what direction my medical challenges need to go.

There is no fake news and real news, no he said she said in the medical world. Find your best possible information and staff, and move toward your medical reality confident in the integrity of what is known at this point. I only wish that we could use the words integrity and government in the same phrase…that would be language I’d be hearing!

water and words

#hesaidshesaid    #melanomatheskin   #cancer   #melanoma #naturalskinrocks #medical integrity #danafarber  #scotus

We can-cer vive!

Janis

 

Heir Apparent

Battle Royal

Yes, I sometimes think in dark places.  I mean with metastatic melanoma, scars on my face from excisions, radiation treatment, and now a clinical trial, it’s not all that hard to find your mind go murky. At times, I feel like the next in my family, riddled with cancer, to wear the crown of cancer.

bird crane balearica regulorum royalty free

A person of our American royalty, former First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt is the central figure to a fictional account of her life in the book, White Houses by Amy Bloom. I enjoyed reading this novel that imagines the life between Eleanor and Lorena Hickok though it blurred the lines for me between historical information and an invented story. I devoured the book knowing I prefer more factual portrayals of people of ER’s stature.

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One of my favorite quotes by Eleanor Roosevelt hangs on my fridge!

 

Royal Treatment

Why mention White Houses? Author Amy Bloom uses a description about saplings in the woods (forgive me for not having the wording handy). In comparing shaded saplings to people, the author relates the smaller trees will be stunted by those towering trees that relish the canopy, thriving on the light well fought for by competing trees.

An analogy that works eloquently for those of us with skin cancer. Do we now hide in the recesses of  dingy corners of our world? Should we resign ourselves to a tenebrous existence far from the beckoning sun? Are we relegated to be lowly saplings who never benefit from the light?

Those that reach for the light grow!

Hell, no! Shadowy thoughts like that are the last thing we need. Acknowledge those cancer moments, grab your cancer crown (a large brimmed hat for me!) and sun screen, and seek the light, seek the positive.

Use sun-safe habits and your #sunsmarts. Enjoy the things you love and keep solar mindfulness with you at all times. Take your vitamin D and find the courage to get out there! Light is metaphorical for illuminating the positive and also offers physical improvement when sensibly enjoyed. That doesn’t mean ignore your doctors!

Some People are…Well…A Royal Pain

Where did the light come for this blog? I just read a blog post where the writer stated we need direct sun and that sun screen is not good for us. Really? I know that the sun is essential to life; I get that in a big way, but really, no sun safety? Yes, that statement angers me because I GO TO THE DOCTORS, I GO THROUGH THE PAIN, I FIGHT FOR MY LIFE. I commented on that blog! The response explained that melanoma is a blessing. Really? No words here.

landscape nature sun forest
Stand Tall!

Reach for the light every day. Open your mind, open your heart, and you will leave the gloomy thoughts and the darkness in the undergrowth. Don’t read trivial stuff. Do what you love and grow strong; become the tall tree.  #melanomatheskin #cancer #melanoma #readingmatters #becomethetalltree

We can-cer vive!

Janis

 

Red, White, and You

Red, White, and You!

The 4 B’s of Independence Day

Happy 4th of July! Celebrate your independence in breaking from the stereotype that a dark tan is healthy. Independence Day in the United States is a time for boating, barbecues, and beaches. Oh, yeah…it’s also a time for some of the best burns, sunburns that is.

Laughingly, in the past, I couldn’t understand why people went to the beach or barbecue if they wore all those clothes or hid under an umbrella. My sister and I called beach umbrellas “the impalers”, because of their potential to let loose and hurt someone (as well as those pale people sitting under them).

Open Minds, Open Umbrellas

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Now, I am one of those people. I even have a small umbrella that clips to my chair-perfect for those situations where there is no shade and I find myself caught in the sun. I keep it in the car. Sound extreme? Try having your head snapped down to a radiation table day after day to (hopefully) rid yourself of metastatic melanoma (to name just one treatment phase for melanoma cancer patients)…now that’s extreme. Suddenly, the idea of sun safety makes sense.

It’s great to be white, brown, or whatever your natural skin color is. In Victorian times, women wanted to whiten their skin as described on Women of the World’s site. The idea was that white skin indicated you were an aristocrat and not out working in the fields. While the extreme and unhealthy measures such as bathing in arsenic springs were prevalent, we know better now about whitening the skin. Today, we also know about reddening the skin and skin damage.

Burn Baby, Burn

Contemporary culture has given us more leisure. A less agrarian society (unfortunately), people enjoy free time. For generations, we’ve viewed darkening our skin as a sign of beauty. Media continues to depict tanned bodies as the beautiful, healthy look we crave. This needs to change because I’m just not craving my next immunotherapy. Are you?

#naturalskinrocks

#Naturalskinrocks, whatever your color-love you, love hue! Dana Farber Cancer Institute dedicates the 6th floor to melanoma and other skin cancers.  That’s where I go for the clinical trial that I participate in on a regular basis.  We’re all there together, terrified and seeking resolution, seeking life; every person with every skin color imaginable, seeking hope and answers.

Scan Versus Tan

Skin cancer and in particular, melanoma knows no color barrier, no discrimination here.  Think your genes are meant for sunbathing, and that you are not going to get cancer because your genetic makeup is to have dark skin? We all think we are safe until we find ourselves on the 6th floor of Dana Farber. Now I scan (MRI, CAT, etc) instead of tan. I’m not wanting to scare you, I’m wanting you to help change our culture away from the solar genuflection that kills. Avoid the red, avoid the burn.

Happy 4th of July

Celebrate Independence! Celebrate the red, white, and blue! Celebrate creating a culture of #sunsmarts.  #melanomatheskin #melanoma #skincancer #naturalskinrocks #avoidtheburn #Happyfourthofjuly

We Can-cer vive!

Janis